As I walk into this house, I feel anger and despair. Like a wave of emotions taking over me. I look at the door and a deep depression runs through me. A feeling so familiar, yet so powerful that it drops me to my knees.
Forced tears out of my eyes, and just when I felt I was about to burst from all the pain inside the sound of someone screaming deep in the hallway and shocked me and just like that, and just like that all of the painful emotions I felt just washed away. I tried to run away, but couldn’t seem to find the right door. When I open one door I feel scared, when I open another pain. I open another door and I feel plain a worthless nobody. The last door I opened lead me back to the same place I started. In front of the long dark and cold hallway. Wondering what why or who would could be doing this. When I hear the scream again. I try to run away but it seems to be that my feet have a mind of there own.
As I make my way through the hallway I feel something so familiar comfortable. But as I get closer that comfort turns into despair. I was scared, not at what was at the end but at myself. The closer I get the worse I feel dirty and defeated. I get to the end of the hallway I see a long dark curtain hesitant to see what was behind I take a deep breath and pull it down. As it falls to the floor it sounds like shattered glass. A Sharp pain in my chest drops me to the floor trying to get up but can’t.
So much pressure on me pushing me down. I hear a whisper “look at me” I look up and see a big mirror I look in it and all I see is a very dark shadow hovering inside. As scary as it seemed I was strangely connected to it.”I am more than what you think of me to be” it whispers to me. I ask “what do you mean””who are you.” “I am all that you are” I look closer and a light so faint began to shine over the shadow. I started to understand what had happened, what the feelings meant. They where Reflections of me of my life so scared to be the real me unsure of myself. Feeling degraded by many people telling me I’m not good enough I’m not worth enough I’m not man enough the more I understand the brighter the light shined. It shined over a me the dark shadow becoming a brighter person.
A person not defined by his genitals, hair,color,height, or sexuality. I see, I can see clearly now its me the new me under a light so bright it lite the hole house. I’m not hiding myself anymore. I am not living a lie, I’m living my life